This is Part 4 of the blog post series, “I’m Friends With A Guy… GASP!” Click on these links to read the introduction and the other parts of this series!
Here’s Question #3 that I talked about in the introduction to this blog post series:
Question #3: “Doesn’t being friends with guys mean that you’ve shared your heart with a ton of guys?”
Not really. Again, you have to be careful. But there are millions of things that I’ve shared with my girl friends and my parents that I would never dream of sharing with a guy until I’m courting/dating! My dreams, my hopes, my darkest secrets, my emotion swings, my plans for life in the future… Those are things to guard, to protect, to not tell the guys in my life.
Do you have to be cautious? Oh yes! But maybe not as cautious as you think…
Let’s take the 1 Timothy 5 verse I talked about in the introduction (1 Timothy 5:1, “Do not sharply rebuke an older man, but rather appeal to him as a father, to the younger men as brothers, the older women as mothers, and the younger women as sisters, in all purity.”) It talks about treating young women and young men as brothers and sister in all purity. Hmm… Brothers and sisters in all purity…….
I don’t know about you, but I talk to my siblings! A lot! In fact, my brother and I were up really late talking just the other night about life! We talk about private things, but never too private. There are just lines we don’t cross because he’s a guy and I’m a girl. There are physical boundary lines that we don’t cross, as well. Do we give each other hugs? Yes! Do we talk about our lives? Yes! Do we really love each other and honor and respect each other? Yes! Do we go out and do fun things together? Yes! If those things are considered perfectly normal for siblings, than why can’t we talk to our brothers and sisters in Christ, or give them a hug, or talk about life, or meet each other for coffee or lunch or a movie? Maybe even drive to a church event together to save gas? Why can’t we do those things and realize that it’s all ok as long as we guard our hearts and just try to be friends and point each other towards Christ?
I hope you have a great relationship with your biological brothers and sisters. And if you do…. Why can’t you have a similar relationship with your brothers and sisters in Christ, who should be almost as dear and as close to you as your own brothers and sisters?
In fact, that’s something that’s helped me a lot in this journey – really seeing the guys in my life as my brothers. Oh, I’ve adopted quite a few of them. Most of them put up with me being their “big sister,” or “little sister” as the case may be. Yes, I’m pretty short compared to most of them. But at the same time, if we truly see each other as brothers and sisters in Christ, there are less crushes. There’s less drama. Everything becomes more service-oriented instead of self-oriented. You care less about how you look or how you act or who notices you. You’re serving Christ’s kingdom together! And you end up becoming great friends! Not only that, but you get to learn what each other is really like. You never get to know someone better than when you’re serving with them and treating them as a sibling. Maybe you’ll even marry one of these guys/girls one day! Who knows? But until then, enjoy being a family and enjoy having lots of brothers and sisters who have your back, who love you, who are there to have a conversation with you when you need it, or give you a hug when you need it, or pray for you when you need it. Trust me. You won’t regret the friendships that you build with your brothers and sisters in Christ.
Stayed tuned for Part 4 of the series, coming soon!