This blog post series is the 3rd in the series, “I’m Friends With A Guy… GASP!!!” Read the introduction and part 1 here!
Now, onto Question #2 out of the questions I asked in the introduction!
Question #2: “Is that smart? Being friends with so many guys? Shouldn’t you be investing time in the girls around you?”
Oh but I do! Who says I don’t invest time in the girls in my life? Yes, this blog post series is generally about my guy friends. But that doesn’t mean I don’t invest time (and usually a lot more time!) in my relationships with my girl friends than my guy friends! I love my girl friends so much! I try and be a “Titus 2 Woman” even now. Yes, I’m not really that old yet. But there are still girls that are younger than me that I can try to encourage and point back to Christ as God would want me to do based on that passage. Just because I may have more guys in my life than girls doesn’t mean that I don’t spend time with girls. I spend a ton of time with them!
I have three accountability partners who, like my parents, know everything about me. They are all girls. At my acting group, as I said, there are way more girls than guys. I’ve taken many of them under my wings to be their big sister and their friend, loving on them and discipling them as best as I can through God’s grace. I don’t have any biological sisters, and I’m thrilled that many of them have been willing to let me “adopt” them into my family. I’m much closer to all of them than I am with my guy friends currently – at least until I meet “the one.” They are beautiful treasures to me, and I would never trade their friendships for the world! They’re girls, and generally speaking, they know me better than most guys ever will.
And while I definitely want to encourage good and godly guy/girl friendships, I do want to stress that it’s important to be a friend to all, and particularly that you need to make sure you have accountability partners be of the same gender as you. Guarding your heart is important. That doesn’t mean that you can’t talk to guys/girls about the deeper things of God. But your most intimate thoughts shouldn’t be shared around with any young men, or young women as the case may be. Reserve the deepest thoughts of your heart for God, your parents, your accountability partners, and your future spouse alone.
Have those earnest and godly relationships with members of the same sex first before you begin closer friendships with members of the opposite sex. My accountability partners watch me and let me know when I’ve crossed lines or need to not be so friendly around the guys in my life. They help me stay guarded and truly stay “just friends” with the guys I’m around. Their relationship and insight is invaluable to me. I wouldn’t trade it for the world!
Again, this all comes down to good communication. Also, humility and teachability. Listen to your accountability partners and make sure you’re investing in everyone in your life, not just singling out the guys or girls as the case might be. Remember that we’re here on earth to serve others and live for others, just as Christ came to serve and live for us.
Mark 10:45, “For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life as a ransom for many.” (Emphasis mine.)
Stayed tuned for Question #3 in just a few days!